Monday, February 10, 2025

Living with a Pure Heart

 

Introduction

Imagine you’re in your early 20s, just going through the motions of life, when—out of nowhere—everything changes. That’s what happened to James. He wasn’t looking for God, but one night, after following a friend to a church service, he had an encounter with Jesus that turned his world upside down. It wasn’t just emotional or intellectual—it was real. He described it as feeling cleansed, awakened, and more alive than ever before.

James embraced his new faith with enthusiasm. He prayed, worshiped, read his Bible, and let go of his old, destructive habits. He knew that God loved him, that Jesus had died for him, and that one day, he would spend eternity in heaven. But after the excitement settled, he found himself facing a question that many believers wrestle with: What am I here for now?

He knew salvation wasn’t just about waiting for heaven. He saw others in the church following strict rules, but that didn’t seem to match the grace he had received. He heard that some were called to ministry, but he wasn’t sure if that was for him. Meanwhile, he was finishing his doctorate in computer science—was that part of his Christian life or just a side note? Was his faith only about getting saved and helping others do the same, or was there something more?

This is where many Christians find themselves—saved, but unsure of what comes after belief.

And here’s the answer: God didn’t just save us from something; He saved us for something. Our purpose is not just to get to heaven but to be transformed into the people He created us to be. Romans 8:29 tells us that God’s goal is to conform us to the image of His Son. In other words, the Christian life is about character—becoming more like Jesus in everything we do, whether in ministry, the workplace, or our daily interactions.

The question isn’t just, “What am I saved from?” but “What am I being shaped into?” Because the purpose of life isn’t just salvation—it’s transformation. (Adapted from After You Believe, N. T. Wright, pp. 1-3.)


The Heart of the Kingdom

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus teaches what it means to be a citizen of the Kingdom of Heaven. We can make Kingdom citizenship all about following certain laws, believing that our righteousness is defined both by the spiritual things we do and the worldly things we avoid. However, our actions are only part of the story. What really matters is our heart—what we think, how we feel, and what we desire. These things influence the way we live.

Jesus taught that Kingdom citizens embrace values such as humility, meekness, and a hunger for righteousness. These values shape our mission: to influence the world for the Kingdom by being salt and light. To do that, we must live righteous lives—not just obeying the Law but being transformed from the inside out. Our motivations matter.

Looking forward, we must ask, Who am I when no one is watching? As N.T. Wright puts it, “When you’re suddenly put to the test and don’t have time to think about how you’re coming across, your real nature will come out. That’s why character needs to go all the way through: Whatever fills you will spill out. And it’s up to you to do something about it.”(After You Believe, p. 28.) Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 5:27-37 addresses how our thoughts, desires, and integrity reveal the true condition of our hearts.


Jesus’ Teachings on a Pure Heart

1. Purity Begins in the Heart (Matthew 5:27–28)

Jesus affirms the commandment against adultery but he takes it further—lustful thoughts are equivalent to adultery in God’s eyes. The issue is not mere attraction but dwelling thoughts and desires that take our hearts and minds in directions they are not intended to go. Lustful thoughts are sinful because:

  • They defile marriage, even for those not married. Sex is reserved for marriage, and to place it anywhere else, even in our thoughts, dishonors God’s design for both marriage and sexuality.

  • They reduce people to objects for self-gratification. Every person is created in God’s image and deserves honor and respect.

  • They misuse God’s gift of imagination and reflection. Our minds are capable of creativity, problem-solving, and meditation. Paul instructs us in Philippians 4:8 to think about good things. Lust corrupts this gift.

We need to realize that lust is not some loophole for us to have some fun without actually sinning. Jesus taught that it is a serious issue that needs to be addressed. Examine your thought life and take steps to guard your mind.

2. Taking Radical Measures (Matthew 5:29–30)

Jesus uses hyperbole to emphasize the seriousness of sin—if something causes you to stumble, remove it. While not literal, this highlights the need for drastic action against temptation. The image Jesus presents is that of a resurrected body bearing the evidence of the struggle against sin rather than going to hell with whole body.

Lust may seem like a private sin, but Jesus teaches that it requires serious action. Filters and accountability help, but even a blind handless man can still lust. Since we live in a world full of temptation we need to have our hearts transformed. Pursue spiritual disciplines—prayer, meditation, and Scripture—to reorient your desires. One of the places to begin is this prayer from John Eldredge: Prayer for Sexual Healing

3. Honoring the Sanctity of Marriage (Matthew 5:31–32)

Jewish law permitted divorce, with rabbinical debates on what made divorce allowable. Some were lenient, others strict. What was the real issue? For Jesus the real issue wasn’t the justifiable reasons for divorce, but the sacredness of marriage. Marriage is to represent God’s covenant love for His people. Therefore divorce distorts the reflection of God’s faithfulness that is to be expressed through marriage.

Jesus isn’t entering into the divorce debate of his day, but rather he is emphasizing the fact that marriage is a sacred covenant that needs to be honored. Whether married, single, or divorced, we are all called to uphold the sanctity of marriage.

4. Integrity in Speech (Matthew 5:33–37)

In Jesus’ time, people swore oaths to manipulate trust. Some Jews would swear by God’s name, but most, in order to keep God’s name holy, would use substitutes that were connected with God (heaven, earth, Jerusalem). Jesus teaches that Kingdom citizens should be people of integrity, whose “yes” means yes and “no” means no. We already bear God’s name and act as His representatives, and because of this our word should be enough. 

Integrity matters. Let your words reflect God’s faithfulness. If you make a promise, keep it. A life of integrity mirrors the character of Christ.


Conclusion

Jesus calls us to a righteousness greater than the Pharisees—not through stricter rule-keeping but through heart transformation. This means:

  • Taking decisive action against sin.

  • Pursuing purity in thought and deed.

  • Honoring commitments in marriage and relationships.

  • Being trustworthy and truthful in all we say and do.

This requires self-examination. Where does your heart need help? Don’t be content with salvation alone—desire a heart continually transformed into the image of Jesus, reflecting His love, compassion, mercy, and integrity.

Challenge: Take time this week to examine your heart. Where do you need transformation? Pray, surrender, and trust that God, who began a good work in you, will carry it to completion (Philippians 1:6).

Let God reshape your heart to reflect His purity, love, and integrity.

Friday, February 7, 2025

Philosophy of Discipleship



What is a disciple? A disciple is someone who is passionately committed to becoming more like Jesus Christ.

Jesus said:

"Students are not greater than their teacher, and slaves are not greater than their master. Students are to be like their teacher, and slaves are to be like their master" (Matthew 10:24-25a, NLT).

Similarly, the apostle John wrote:

"Those who say they live in God should live their lives as Jesus did" (1 John 2:6, NLT).

Being a disciple is not merely about learning correct doctrine; it’s about embodying it through action and adjusting our lives to reflect Jesus.


The Role of a Disciple in the Church

Disciples are the heartbeat of the local church. They provide the service, sacrifice, and leadership that make ministry possible. Disciples pray regularly for the church family and for individuals, showing genuine care for others. They seek opportunities to share Christ’s love with non-believers and provide the wisdom and guidance that help the church community fulfill its mission. Most importantly, disciples serve as examples for others to follow. A healthy church is built on mature, dedicated disciples who demonstrate what it means to live as a follower of Jesus.


What is Discipleship?

Discipleship is the intentional process of forming disciples. Jesus left the church with a clear mandate:

"Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you" (Matthew 28:19-20a, NLT).

This task of making disciples doesn’t happen by accident—it requires intentionality and planning. While the methods may vary across church communities, one thing remains constant: discipleship is essential to a thriving, vibrant church.


The Role of Discipleship in the Church

Discipleship is the most vital ministry of the church. It ensures the ongoing health of the church community and empowers the church to impact its surrounding culture. While some individuals grow in faith through personal discipline, most of us need guidance, encouragement, and accountability to continue maturing. Discipleship provides that essential structure, helping believers grow and develop, thereby strengthening the church as a whole.


My Philosophy of Discipleship

The mission of the church is to make disciples—this is what Jesus called us to do (Matthew 28:18-20). Discipleship must be a top priority for every church family. In examining Jesus' ministry, we can identify three essential components for any discipleship program:

1. Discipleship is Founded on Prayer

Luke’s gospel shows us that Jesus prayed before selecting His twelve apostles (Luke 6:12-13). In John’s gospel, we see Jesus praying for His disciples on the night of His betrayal (John 17:1-26). Prayer is foundational for discipleship because it connects us with God’s will and empowers us for ministry. Discipleship begins and thrives in an atmosphere of prayer.

2. Discipleship Happens Through Teaching

Jesus’ ministry was primarily one of teaching (Matthew 4:23). Faith begins with knowledge, and knowledge is passed on through teaching. To become like Jesus, people must first learn how Jesus lived and what He expects of us. A healthy discipleship program will offer both personal and group study opportunities to learn God’s Word. For believers to align their lives with God’s will, they must first understand what that will is.

3. Discipleship Results in Ministry

At a certain point, Jesus sent His disciples out to do ministry. Luke 9:1-6 describes how Jesus sent out the Twelve to preach and heal, and in Luke 10:1-16, He sent out seventy-two others to carry out His mission. Ministry is where disciples experience God at work in and through their lives. A strong discipleship program will provide opportunities for people to serve—both within the church and in the community. By engaging in ministry, disciples put their faith into action and live out God’s will.



Additional Principles for Effective Discipleship: Faith and Patience

While prayer, teaching, and ministry are essential, two additional principles are crucial for effective discipleship: faith and patience. We must trust that, as we commit to the discipleship process, the Holy Spirit is working in people’s lives, even when we can’t immediately see the results. Patience is key, as spiritual growth rarely happens overnight. It took three years for Jesus to prepare His group of disciples to lead the early church, and we can’t expect overnight transformations. We must trust God’s timing and remain committed to the process, knowing that He is faithfully at work.


By committing to these principles—prayer, teaching, ministry, faith, and patience—the church can fulfill its mission of making disciples and nurturing a thriving, spiritually healthy community.

Wednesday, February 5, 2025

The Journey of Christian Spiritual Formation


 Spiritual formation in Christ is a deliberate and structured journey. While God can work through chaos, He has chosen to engage with us through intentional and clear pathways. Instead of passively wondering what God is up to in our lives, we are called to embrace the means He has provided for our growth. These pathways are revealed in Scripture, particularly through the life and teachings of Jesus Christ.

Life in our modern American culture is fast and busy. Since it is easy to have a full schedule it is tempting to “go with the flow.” This path of least resistance requires little effort but allows our culture to be the greatest influence in our spiritual formation. Many Christians struggle with spiritual maturity because we allow ourselves to drift instead of actively engaging the means to become more like Jesus.


Even so, God is gracious. He brings healing and transformation to our lives, even when we fail to fully engage in the process of our own spiritual development. This is a profound reminder of His goodness and love toward us, even in our shortcomings.


One challenge in discussing spiritual formation is the fear of being misunderstood as promoting “salvation by works.” This often leads to an emphasis on faith, which can, unfortunately, be reduced to intellectual agreement to doctrine and adherence to a certain moral standard. While truth is essential, faith is far more than believing the right things.


Biblical faith is defined by trust, commitment, and obedience—qualities that are reflected in how we live. Spiritual formation, then, is an active process that is to result in good works. These works are the fruit of genuine faith.


The journey of spiritual formation has a clear starting point: repentance. Jesus emphasized repentance throughout His ministry. In Matthew 4:17 (NLT), He declared, “Repent of your sins and turn to God, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.”


Repentance is not just feeling regret or making a confession; it is a true shift in our loyalties. Sin is rebellion against God and His Kingdom, and through repentance, we consciously change our allegiance. This act of turning away from the world and turning to God signifies a new loyalty—a declaration of citizenship in the Kingdom of Heaven.


True repentance is foundational to spiritual formation. It is not merely a formality but an act of faith: a decision to trust, commit, and obey God. From this starting point, our journey begins, and as we continue, God works within us to transform us into the likeness of King Jesus.


As we pursue spiritual formation, it is crucial that we remain both intentional and humble, allowing God to guide us. The process may be challenging, but it is the path to becoming who we were created to be in King Jesus—a journey of purpose, growth, and grace.

Tuesday, February 4, 2025

Parenting in a Digital World: Digital Relationships & Online Safety


 As we conclude our Parenting in a Digital World series, let’s take a moment to reflect on what we’ve learned so far:

  1. Parenting Principles in a Digital Age
    Protect, guide, and empower our children to use technology responsibly.
  2. Discovering Our “Why”
    Digital parenting matters because our children’s well-being matters.
  3. Building a Family Digital Culture
    Establishing healthy boundaries fosters stronger relationships.
  4. Avoiding Inappropriate Content
    Utilizing parental controls and open communication helps protect children from harmful exposure.
  5. Protecting Mental Health
    Limiting screen time and encouraging offline activities fosters emotional well-being.

Parenting in the digital world is not easy—it takes intentional action to help our children mature into emotionally healthy and productive individuals. As Christians, we view this responsibility as part of the discipleship of our children.


One Reality of the Online World

The online world offers the exciting possibility of meeting new people and forming relationships. However, it is also filled with potential dangers and pitfalls. It’s crucial to understand both the positive and risky aspects of digital relationships.


Understanding Digital Relationships

Navigating the digital world means understanding the nuances of modern relationships. Let’s dive into the key aspects:

1. Online Friends vs. Real Friends

  • Online Friendships Can Feel Meaningful but Often Lack Real-World Depth:
    Today’s children and teens easily form friendships through social media, gaming, and chat platforms. While these relationships can provide emotional support and a sense of belonging, they might lack the depth that comes from face-to-face interactions. Digital connections often miss out on the subtle cues—like body language and tone—that are essential for truly supportive and reliable relationships.

  • Social Media Creates an Illusion of Closeness, But True Friendships Require Accountability and Shared Experiences:
    The constant flow of messages and updates can make online interactions feel intimate, yet the lack of physical presence often means less accountability. Real friendships thrive on shared experiences, mutual trust, and the understanding that comes when friends spend time together in person. This connection fosters deeper bonds and helps navigate conflicts more effectively.

  • Key Question: Would This Person Be in Your Life Without a Screen?
    This thought-provoking question encourages both parents and children to reflect on the authenticity of their digital relationships. Are these friendships based solely on online interactions, or would they remain significant in a non-digital context?

2. Social Comparison & Peer Pressure

  • Social Media Highlights Only the Best Moments, Leading to Unrealistic Comparisons:
    Platforms like Instagram and Facebook showcase only the highlights of someone’s life—moments of success and joy—creating a distorted view that can lead children and teens to compare their everyday lives unfavorably.

  • Validation from Likes and Comments Can Impact Self-Esteem:
    In the digital age, social validation is often measured by likes, comments, and shares. When the anticipated response is not received, it can result in feelings of inadequacy or rejection, adversely affecting self-esteem and mental health.

  • Healthy Habits:
    Encourage real-life interactions, hobbies, and critical thinking about online portrayals. Help your children see beyond the “highlight reel” and appreciate that real life is multifaceted and complex.


The Dangers of Digital Relationships

While digital connections offer many benefits, they also come with risks. Here are some of the key dangers and how to address them:

1. Cyberbullying

  • Occurs on Social Media, Gaming Platforms, and Group Chats:
    Cyberbullying can manifest across various digital channels—from hurtful comments on social media to targeted harassment in online gaming and group chats.

  • Signs Include Withdrawal from Social Interactions and Emotional Distress:
    Children experiencing cyberbullying might withdraw from both online and offline social interactions, become unusually quiet after using their devices, or display sudden mood changes such as increased anxiety or sadness. Early recognition of these signs is crucial.

  • Parental Strategies:

    • Open Communication: Let your child know they can come to you if they encounter negativity online.
    • Blocking/Reporting: Teach them to block or report abusive behavior.
    • Promoting Respectful Online Behavior: Reinforce the importance of kindness and respect in digital interactions.

2. Online Predators & Grooming

  • Predators Use Fake Identities, Secrecy, and Flattery to Manipulate Children:
    Online predators often create fake profiles to gain the trust of unsuspecting children. They may shower kids with compliments, gifts, or attention to slowly build a relationship that can turn dangerous.

  • Warning Signs:

    • Requests for personal information
    • Encouraging secret conversations
    • Suggesting in-person meetups
  • Prevention Tips:

    • Educate Your Children: Teach them about the risks of sharing personal information online.
    • Use Parental Controls: Limit their exposure to unsafe platforms.
    • Monitor Online Interactions: Regular check-ins can ensure your child is navigating the digital world safely.

Practical Steps for Online Safety

Creating a secure online environment for your children involves both technological tools and proactive communication. Here are some practical steps every family can implement:

1. Parental Controls & Monitoring

  • Leveraging Built-In Settings and Tools:
    Modern devices come equipped with robust parental control features. Tools like BarkQustodio, and Covenant Eyes help filter inappropriate content, set screen time limits, and monitor online interactions.

  • Balancing Oversight with Trust:
    While it’s important to monitor your child’s digital activity, explain why these controls are in place and involve them in setting appropriate limits. This transparency fosters trust while keeping them safe.

2. Safe Browsing & Online Behavior

  • Identifying Online Threats:
    Educate your children about common tactics used in scams, phishing, and fake profiles. Teach them to recognize suspicious links, verify website authenticity, and avoid sharing personal information with unverified sources.

  • Understanding What to Share:
    Help your children differentiate between safe and unsafe information to share online. Discuss which personal details (like full names, addresses, or travel plans) should remain private and emphasize the importance of protecting sensitive information.

3. Family Digital Contract

  • Setting Clear Expectations:
    A Family Digital Contract is a collaborative agreement that outlines the rules for online behavior, screen time, and safety. It ensures that everyone in the household understands their responsibilities and the boundaries necessary for a safe digital environment.

  • Regular Reviews and Updates:
    As technology evolves, so should your family’s digital rules. Set aside time periodically—perhaps every few months—to review and update the contract, reinforcing that digital safety is a shared responsibility.


Key Takeaways

  1. Help Children Distinguish Between Online and Real-Life Relationships
    Not all connections made online have the same depth or reliability as those formed in person. Encourage your child to ask whether a friend would still be significant without the digital screen as a barrier, fostering a balanced perspective.

  2. Recognize and Prevent Digital Dangers Like Cyberbullying and Online Predators
    Awareness is the first step in safeguarding your child. Teach them to identify signs of cyberbullying and understand the tactics of online predators. Equip them with strategies like blocking or reporting abusive behavior and maintaining privacy with personal details.

  3. Model and Enforce Safe Online Habits Through Parental Controls and Open Discussions
    Your actions set the stage for your child’s digital behavior. Model safe online habits by practicing thoughtful posting, respectful communication, and mindful sharing. Use parental controls alongside open, honest discussions about why these measures are necessary. Involving your child in setting up a Family Digital Contract reinforces the importance of boundaries and shared responsibility.


Final Thought

By continuing these conversations and implementing practical strategies, we empower our children to navigate the digital world with wisdom and confidence. This ongoing dialogue not only builds their awareness but also instills a sense of responsibility that will serve them well as they grow and engage in an increasingly digital society.


Thank you for joining me on this journey through the complexities of digital parenting. Let’s continue to support and guide our children as they learn to thrive in both the digital and real worlds.

— Paul

Shattered Dreams: Far Too Easily Pleased

Part 4 of 4 in the “Shattered Dreams” Series “We are halfhearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy ...